I have this in common with you, Jess: “I know this intimately because I grew up in misogyny…in the church. I internalized it for years.” Fortunately, I’m better now.
My father was a Baptist minister then switched to Church of the Nazarene. Same flavor, different name. My mother’s family is in Missouri. Sedalia, to be exact. Spent many a summer in my youth running around with my cousins, trout fishing, picking tomatoes out of my aunt’s garden, attended Missouri State Fair. The beliefs of your grandfather sound very similar to one of my cousin’s and his wife. I think they live in Springfield now. Some of my family have turned full maga cult, others not so much. I refuse to have contact with the MAGAs or any of them who voted for T this time around. I have no common cause with people who are supporting the oppression of women, including the women who voted for him.
Anyway, I appreciate your insights and reading your posts.
RLT and Jess, I too was raised with religious "rules" crammed down my throat. I thought I had no right to question anything that was told me, over and over.🙈🙉🙊 My mother was Pentecostal Holiness and my father was an atheist. What saved me was my father's advice to live by the Golden Rule, but ask questions.
The people around me who have known me as a people-pleaser are now shocked that I have found my voice.A voice that was silenced for so many years. I honestly didn't think I could have an opinion of my own, and I certainly didn't think anyone would listen.
Hypocrisy is alive in this nightmare in which we're living. May we one day have pleasant dreams and awaken to the nightmare having disappeared.
Another powerful read Jess. But here’s a question: might Biden have enough time left to PUSH THROUGH THE EQUAL RIGHTS AMENDMENT? Apparently the needed number of states have approved. This could at least block some of the heinous crap in Project 2025. Jess Cravens 11/21 Chop Wood Carry Water has how to’s …
Kym, Got an email on this from Democrats Abroad urging us to write Biden or Harris at this site: https://www.whitehouse.gov/contact/share/ to push them to do just that, with a sample text I'll copy here:
Subject: Publish the Equal Rights Amendment
Dear President Biden,
With the remaining weeks of your term, there is a unique opportunity to make a lasting impact on our nation's commitment to equality. The Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) offers a clear path to guaranteeing equal rights for women under the Constitution, and it can be added with a single action from you.
By ensuring the ERA is published, you would help protect against the rollback of rights, empower the judiciary to combat sex discrimination, and pave the way for further progress toward sex and gender equality. And importantly, it would strengthen legal protections for abortion access and reproductive healthcare.
We kindly urge you to instruct the U.S. Archivist to certify and publish the ERA in the Constitution before your term concludes. This action would affirm our nation's commitment to equal rights and leave a profound legacy for future generations.
Thank you for your time and consideration of this important matter.
Sincerely,
They add that Publication will only occur if there is pressure too great to ignore. THAT'S quite a bummer, but worth a shot. We've only been waiting since the 1970s, right?
In a lifetime of disgusting lies, when Putin’s Pinocchio came out and said he was a “protector” of women, I about puked. For a serial sexual assaulter like him to say that, was the worst lie I could imagine. And, the people who voted for him can rationalize all they want, but when they voted for him, they voted in favor of sexual assault and the oppression of women in general.
Ran across this last night on the Fb page of a woman I know who voted for him. It almost turned my stomach and kept me awake and angry half the night. 2,500 reposts:
"Liberal chicks are vowing to stay away from men, refusing marriage, dating, sex and child-bearing, calling it 4B.
Looks like we just solved the abortion crisis and made it exceptionally easy for men to avoid dating crazy psychopaths.
Winning. Added bonus, cleaning up the gene pool".
What do you even say to women that frickin' stupid? "Enjoy your S Korea, ladies"? (Which is where the 4B movement originated, thanks to all the unpunished violence against women.)
She doesn’t seem to understand the difference between North and South Korea, for one thing. But that’s pretty typical of a country in which half its citizens read at a 6th-grade level.
Really? If we widened and deepened the channel in the gene pool we would be one hell of a lot better members of the electorate. I mean the only left is one caveat and we can't even fulfill it. "A well-informed and educated electorate."
Not adhering to their instructions has brought us here. A Third World shit hole populated by idiots.
The demographic that voted him is unreachable. If you haven't realized that by now you have contributed into our less than first world status. This is not about Trump and the Republicans winning. This is about the democratic party not offering legitimate candidates, policy or platform losing.the totals of the popular vote explicitly pointed out.
Preach it, Jess! I was once married to a man who had been raised in that church but thankfully he admired my independence. But family gatherings were a bit strained. Anyway, women are not possessions to be protected. We are individual human beings who can take care of ourselves—so long as our laws reflect the democratic values we fought so hard to attain.
Spot on. Until we acknowledge that religion - the system that is allowed to control women in any iteration it determines - is the core driver of the MAGA world view this will continue as a permission structure. It is vital that women be submissive, be used, be silent, be adjuncts to men - the right kind of men. Men who control the narrative-and control women's bodies, activities, futures, and even permission to speak. As my fundmentalist pastor (also my father) verbally smacked me with one day when I was getting too mouthy*, suggesting women be allowed to serve on the church board; "No. ("Why?' I decided to retort.) "Because", he pontificated, "Women are known to talk too much and not keep confidences!"
Thankfully, it became one of the thousand little cuts that eventually led me out of my deep indoctrination, though it was a journey of decades.
(*And at that time I had my B.Ed. in Education, emphasis in history and political science from our State University. I realized this was nothing to him.)
Wow. I am always amazed and in awe of women like yourself who were strong enough to get out of that. That takes grit and guts. I'm so proud you got a good education as well. Congratulations.
Some men are far more "stimulated" by a woman in a long dress and black stockings or knee socks than they are by women in revealing workout garb. Maybe women should be able to dress how they want and count on men to just behave like adults instead of randy teenagers?
Hegseth has an association with The Communion of Reformed Evangelical Churches CREC(tins). They support taking away the right to vote from women, barring non-christians from government offices and open warfare against LGBTQ community.
Outstanding article. Should be front and center in our government. Only when women are in charge will there be any chance of preventing these predators from abusing women.
I think this is my favorite piece you've written. You said everything perfectly. I grew up during a time when girls weren't even allowed to wear pants to school. I can still remember taking them off in elementary school upon arrival. We were allowed to wear pants in the winter, but still had to take them off when we got to school. And I lived in MN. It gets very cold there! I think I was in 7th grade or so before pants were allowed and then, we had to wear dressy pants - no jeans. It breaks my heart that we are going backward, and I am worried about what's ahead, especially for women and girls. Thank God for voices like yours. I'm all in as a witness and loudspeaker. Keep writing.
We couldn't wear pants to school until I was a junior in high school. I think they started letting us wear pants because we were wearing our dresses & skirts so short - that they thought pants (slacks) were a more modest choice!!
Nick Fuentes' taunt, "Your body, my choice," means that he will intervene in your life you when it feels right and rape you when it feels right and deny you an abortion when it feels right. The privilege oozing from the smarmy, hypocritical Republicans including Kennedy Jr, Hegseth and Gaetz is a thumb in the eye of any American woman who feels self-respect and autonomy in our society. Your explanations of how the patriarchy of organized religion muzzles and subjugates women in 2024 are chilling and depressing. And these are the same folks who want a theocracy for us all. In 1980, Reagan united the monied elite, the religious right and the disenfranchised fly-over state whites. In 2025, we gotta figure out how to make an equally big (bigger) tent for all of us incensed by the theocrats, Christian nationalists, misogynists, xenophobes, etc and make it about democracy, not culture wars. Democracy as in the Constitution.
And speaking of control, how about these” Christianites” start remembering the prohibition against lusting after another who is not one’s wife? Some personal responsibility lies there too.
I have this in common with you, Jess: “I know this intimately because I grew up in misogyny…in the church. I internalized it for years.” Fortunately, I’m better now.
My father was a Baptist minister then switched to Church of the Nazarene. Same flavor, different name. My mother’s family is in Missouri. Sedalia, to be exact. Spent many a summer in my youth running around with my cousins, trout fishing, picking tomatoes out of my aunt’s garden, attended Missouri State Fair. The beliefs of your grandfather sound very similar to one of my cousin’s and his wife. I think they live in Springfield now. Some of my family have turned full maga cult, others not so much. I refuse to have contact with the MAGAs or any of them who voted for T this time around. I have no common cause with people who are supporting the oppression of women, including the women who voted for him.
Anyway, I appreciate your insights and reading your posts.
Solidarity, friend
RLT and Jess, I too was raised with religious "rules" crammed down my throat. I thought I had no right to question anything that was told me, over and over.🙈🙉🙊 My mother was Pentecostal Holiness and my father was an atheist. What saved me was my father's advice to live by the Golden Rule, but ask questions.
The people around me who have known me as a people-pleaser are now shocked that I have found my voice.A voice that was silenced for so many years. I honestly didn't think I could have an opinion of my own, and I certainly didn't think anyone would listen.
Hypocrisy is alive in this nightmare in which we're living. May we one day have pleasant dreams and awaken to the nightmare having disappeared.
Thanks Jess for your insights.❤️
Another powerful read Jess. But here’s a question: might Biden have enough time left to PUSH THROUGH THE EQUAL RIGHTS AMENDMENT? Apparently the needed number of states have approved. This could at least block some of the heinous crap in Project 2025. Jess Cravens 11/21 Chop Wood Carry Water has how to’s …
That part!
Kym, Got an email on this from Democrats Abroad urging us to write Biden or Harris at this site: https://www.whitehouse.gov/contact/share/ to push them to do just that, with a sample text I'll copy here:
Subject: Publish the Equal Rights Amendment
Dear President Biden,
With the remaining weeks of your term, there is a unique opportunity to make a lasting impact on our nation's commitment to equality. The Equal Rights Amendment (ERA) offers a clear path to guaranteeing equal rights for women under the Constitution, and it can be added with a single action from you.
By ensuring the ERA is published, you would help protect against the rollback of rights, empower the judiciary to combat sex discrimination, and pave the way for further progress toward sex and gender equality. And importantly, it would strengthen legal protections for abortion access and reproductive healthcare.
We kindly urge you to instruct the U.S. Archivist to certify and publish the ERA in the Constitution before your term concludes. This action would affirm our nation's commitment to equal rights and leave a profound legacy for future generations.
Thank you for your time and consideration of this important matter.
Sincerely,
They add that Publication will only occur if there is pressure too great to ignore. THAT'S quite a bummer, but worth a shot. We've only been waiting since the 1970s, right?
done and shared to FB and Bluesky
Thank you, Sandra!
In a lifetime of disgusting lies, when Putin’s Pinocchio came out and said he was a “protector” of women, I about puked. For a serial sexual assaulter like him to say that, was the worst lie I could imagine. And, the people who voted for him can rationalize all they want, but when they voted for him, they voted in favor of sexual assault and the oppression of women in general.
Ran across this last night on the Fb page of a woman I know who voted for him. It almost turned my stomach and kept me awake and angry half the night. 2,500 reposts:
"Liberal chicks are vowing to stay away from men, refusing marriage, dating, sex and child-bearing, calling it 4B.
Looks like we just solved the abortion crisis and made it exceptionally easy for men to avoid dating crazy psychopaths.
Winning. Added bonus, cleaning up the gene pool".
What do you even say to women that frickin' stupid? "Enjoy your S Korea, ladies"? (Which is where the 4B movement originated, thanks to all the unpunished violence against women.)
Nice to get it off my chest at least...
She doesn’t seem to understand the difference between North and South Korea, for one thing. But that’s pretty typical of a country in which half its citizens read at a 6th-grade level.
Wow....she sure is harsh. A friend I blocked said, they aren't horrible. UM.....
"Cleaning the gene pool"... so we can all join the Handmaid's Tale?
Really? If we widened and deepened the channel in the gene pool we would be one hell of a lot better members of the electorate. I mean the only left is one caveat and we can't even fulfill it. "A well-informed and educated electorate."
Not adhering to their instructions has brought us here. A Third World shit hole populated by idiots.
The demographic that voted him is unreachable. If you haven't realized that by now you have contributed into our less than first world status. This is not about Trump and the Republicans winning. This is about the democratic party not offering legitimate candidates, policy or platform losing.the totals of the popular vote explicitly pointed out.
Terrific read today, miss Jess, and your audio helped get your message across. Thank You and will reStack ASAP 💯👍🤗
Preach it, Jess! I was once married to a man who had been raised in that church but thankfully he admired my independence. But family gatherings were a bit strained. Anyway, women are not possessions to be protected. We are individual human beings who can take care of ourselves—so long as our laws reflect the democratic values we fought so hard to attain.
Spot on. Until we acknowledge that religion - the system that is allowed to control women in any iteration it determines - is the core driver of the MAGA world view this will continue as a permission structure. It is vital that women be submissive, be used, be silent, be adjuncts to men - the right kind of men. Men who control the narrative-and control women's bodies, activities, futures, and even permission to speak. As my fundmentalist pastor (also my father) verbally smacked me with one day when I was getting too mouthy*, suggesting women be allowed to serve on the church board; "No. ("Why?' I decided to retort.) "Because", he pontificated, "Women are known to talk too much and not keep confidences!"
Thankfully, it became one of the thousand little cuts that eventually led me out of my deep indoctrination, though it was a journey of decades.
(*And at that time I had my B.Ed. in Education, emphasis in history and political science from our State University. I realized this was nothing to him.)
Wow. I am always amazed and in awe of women like yourself who were strong enough to get out of that. That takes grit and guts. I'm so proud you got a good education as well. Congratulations.
Wow this is so point on...thanks for saying what needs to be said.
I’m a witness & an ally. Keep speaking & writing, truth-telling.
Thank you!
PREACH!!!!
Some men are far more "stimulated" by a woman in a long dress and black stockings or knee socks than they are by women in revealing workout garb. Maybe women should be able to dress how they want and count on men to just behave like adults instead of randy teenagers?
Hegseth has an association with The Communion of Reformed Evangelical Churches CREC(tins). They support taking away the right to vote from women, barring non-christians from government offices and open warfare against LGBTQ community.
Hegseth sounds like a monster. I wish someone would explain to me why so many women voted for a known abuser.
That's what I'd like to know: Why did something like 53% of White women vote for Trump THIS TIME.? We've had nine years to get to know him.
As a former southern Baptist I am here for this post!!
Me too! Former Southern Baptist, now a proud atheist!
Outstanding article. Should be front and center in our government. Only when women are in charge will there be any chance of preventing these predators from abusing women.
Hi Jess,
I think this is my favorite piece you've written. You said everything perfectly. I grew up during a time when girls weren't even allowed to wear pants to school. I can still remember taking them off in elementary school upon arrival. We were allowed to wear pants in the winter, but still had to take them off when we got to school. And I lived in MN. It gets very cold there! I think I was in 7th grade or so before pants were allowed and then, we had to wear dressy pants - no jeans. It breaks my heart that we are going backward, and I am worried about what's ahead, especially for women and girls. Thank God for voices like yours. I'm all in as a witness and loudspeaker. Keep writing.
We couldn't wear pants to school until I was a junior in high school. I think they started letting us wear pants because we were wearing our dresses & skirts so short - that they thought pants (slacks) were a more modest choice!!
Hi Cyndy,
Oh gosh, you might be right about that!
Nick Fuentes' taunt, "Your body, my choice," means that he will intervene in your life you when it feels right and rape you when it feels right and deny you an abortion when it feels right. The privilege oozing from the smarmy, hypocritical Republicans including Kennedy Jr, Hegseth and Gaetz is a thumb in the eye of any American woman who feels self-respect and autonomy in our society. Your explanations of how the patriarchy of organized religion muzzles and subjugates women in 2024 are chilling and depressing. And these are the same folks who want a theocracy for us all. In 1980, Reagan united the monied elite, the religious right and the disenfranchised fly-over state whites. In 2025, we gotta figure out how to make an equally big (bigger) tent for all of us incensed by the theocrats, Christian nationalists, misogynists, xenophobes, etc and make it about democracy, not culture wars. Democracy as in the Constitution.
Not about protecting, it’s all about controlling.
And speaking of control, how about these” Christianites” start remembering the prohibition against lusting after another who is not one’s wife? Some personal responsibility lies there too.