Yes, It's a Cult. Ask Me How I Know...

The Trump Store.

I’ve written about our yearly trips to Table Rock Lake in Southern Missouri, but I don’t know if I’ve ever written about the town we stay in while visiting the lake. Branson.

If you’re familiar with Branson, you immediately think of the strip with the shows and the bumper boats and the hillbilly-esque vibes, but we don’t stay in that part of town. We head out to the Ozark mountains to stay a week or so every year. I am from those hills, and I can’t get enough of the scenery.

Branson, Missouri lies partially within the boundary of Taney County. Taney County is named in honor of Roger Taney, the fifth Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court. Taney is best known for delivering the infamous majority opinion in Dred Scott v. Sandford.

In an opinion written by Taney, the Court ruled that people of African descent "are not included, and were not intended to be included, under the word 'citizens' in the Constitution, and can therefore claim none of the rights and privileges which that instrument provides for and secures to citizens of the United States"; more specifically, that African Americans were not entitled to "full liberty of speech ... to hold public meetings ... and to keep and carry arms" along with other constitutionally protected rights and privileges.

So, a random county in Southern Missouri was named after a Chief Justice, who is from Maryland, and wrote one of the most racist court decisions in the country? A Chief Justice who said Black folks could never be considered citizens? Okay…

This year, we spent a couple of days on the lake and decided to go to the Branson strip for some frozen custard — hello, Andy’s.

When driving on the strip, I always check to see if the local Confederate store is out of business yet. Regrettably, it is still in business, but there were no cars parked out front except for the pitiful-looking replica of the General Lee. Some very faded T-shirts were displayed outside on a few headless mannequins, with no buyers, so I feel like that’s progress.

I also love that Dolly Parton’s Branson show dropped the word “Dixie” from its name several years ago, and now it is just “The Stampede.” Again, this is progress.

So, imagine my surprise when I noticed a new store right on the main strip in Branson — it was a Trump store, and it was PACKED. The parking lot was full of minivans and lifted trucks.

Soccer moms and 2Aers were excited to worship at the altar of consumerism and Trumpism with a splash of Christian nationalism and a dash of gun violence.

As we drove by, I noticed a mom posing her young daughter next to a Trump mannequin holding an American flag at the entrance to the store. The Trump figure was complete with orange-tinted skin, a blonde wig with a MAGA hat, and a puckered mouth that looked like it was about to rant about water pressure, electric boats, or sharks.

I shook my head as we passed the store, but something about the store nagged me. Actually, it beckoned me — come inside and see the altar for yourself.

So I did, and I brought my family in with me. They didn’t last as long as I did. My tween was disgusted and left quickly, but my country-boy husband blended in so well that as we walked in, a man said, “Sorry, buddy. My wife already bought everything.”

Gross.

Several t-shirts were displayed outside, and it’s important to note that the Trump cult is excited to talk about 45’s felony record. Yes, I know…the party of “law and order” is now proud to vote for a convicted felon, but you have to remember, this is not a political party anymore. These folks are fans. Fan behavior has nothing to do with policies or trade agreements or government directives. These shirts aren’t meant to elicit any response except a laugh from fellow cult members and horror from the rest of us.

I finally made it inside the Trump store and you will not be surprised to learn that the cashier was armed with a semi-automatic pistol. It was holstered on his right side. He welcomed each customer into the store, and told each person leaving, “God bless.”

A great start.

The merchandise in the store is positioned so that you run into a large wall full of Trump hats as soon as you enter the store. It was the altar, and it was bedazzled. The backdrop of the American flags on the windows created a stained-glass effect.

This do in remembrance of me.

The messages on the hats ranged from “Blacks for Trump” to “Make America Godly Again” to “God, Guns, and Trump” to “Jesus is my savior, Trump is my President.”

The seamless blending of every culture war waged by right-wing extremists was bile-inducing.

The thing that struck me is that every hat pictured is made in China. I mean, I thought they were trying to make America great again. Does that include American workers?

I asked an employee if any of their hats were made in America, and she took me to a back room and showed me a plain MAGA mesh-back hat. She told me they only carried one hat made in America. I asked why. She said the store wants to make Trump merchandise “economical” for everyone.

While making my way over to the t-shirts, I saw a wall of bumper stickers that ran the gamut of misogyny, racism, and plain old bigotry. Many were profane, which seemed at odds to the elderly ladies reading the stickers aloud. They laughed at the “Hillary sucks, but not like Monica” sticker, but they stopped to have a conversation about the sticker referring to “idiots” masking during the pandemic.

Masks: the gift that never quits giving. The cult will never forget that they were asked to wear a piece of fabric on their face to lessen the likelihood of killing their neighbors. They will never get over it.

On to the t-shirts. All were made in Mexico.

When I again asked about the country of origin, the sales associate assured me that the t-shirts were in fact American-made, but were shipped to Mexico to have the sleeves sewn on. She said those crazy seamstresses south of the border added the “Made in Mexico” label, but the store is trying to figure out how to change that. Hmmm…

The shirts included phrases such as “Joe and the Hoe” which only made me think of Biden doing a little gardening. There was a tee with a picture of Trump with his two middle fingers up. And there had to be a half-dozen MAGA tees mixed in.

One shirt was different than I’d ever seen, though…especially in a shop with such religious overtones and references to godliness. It read “Eaton/Busch ‘69.” I didn’t even bother to tell the storekeeper that ‘69 was not an election year…

The oddest thing about the Trump cult is that it has supplanted the religion of those who were previously religious, and it has become the “good news” to those who haven’t attended church in years. It lets them feel that they are better than the “demonrats” even though they don’t follow the rules of any religion. They can “grab them by the pussy” and commit felonies, and they are still better than the libs.

They are the chosen because they chose Trump.

They worship Trump because they can be as bad as they want — as racist or as sexist or as homophobic as they can be — and Trump will support the rhetoric. He gives them the “grace” they need to be as awful as they want.

The point of this essay? To pull back the curtain and to give you a little laugh…or a cry.

We are facing a crisis.

The folks who packed the Trump store are likely voters. They are also cult members hell-bent on forcing this country back generations with laws meant to oppress and marginalize the least of us. They will use their ridiculous rhetoric to intimidate us, and if that doesn’t work, they have their guns.

Cult members do not bend to reason. If someone has voted for Trump twice and plans to do so three times, there is no way to reach them. I should know.

Register new voters instead of wasting your breath. Organize your neighbors rather than beating a dead horse. Leave the cult behind and link arms with the willing. If we are going to stop another Trump presidency, we have to work with those who have left the cult or never joined in the first place…

As I was leaving the store, a man was holding a Trump visor. I told him, “I wouldn’t buy it. Almost nothing in this store is American-made.” He looked at me and said, “I know. They love Trump but hate American workers.”

I don’t know if that random man was doing recon like me, or if he was a Trump fan having an epiphany, but I do know this…even the most MAGA parts of this country have folks who see Trump for what he is.

And they vote too.

~Jess