I left catholism a long time ago. Being raised as an Irish catholic in Boston, it was part of my identity. What did it for me, the absolute last straw, was the Boston Globe Spotlight piece on how the church was not only aware of the abuse, but moved offending priests from parish to parish to parish. The one priest that I was very close to, married my husband and I, baptized all three of my children, established the Boston Priests Forum. The group lobbied for Cardinal Law's removal. Instead, Cardinal Law was PROMOTED to the Vatican. First, I left catholism. Then, I moved to the espicocal church, and then detached from them. Then, when I was diagnosed with a terminal illness, I let go of all religion, and decided to spend my time appreciating my family, friends, and especially my husband, a man who showed me how kindness, with no guarantee of reward, was truly the way forward. You have a beautiful garden, and story.❤️
Fitzfield74, I am very sorry that you have been diagnosed with a terminal illness., I applaud your courage to share this and your discovery of what really matters in this life. It validates my own experience, I am glad that you have the love of family and friends and hope you find more moments of love, awe and wonder,
I no longer have a theology either, but this is the one that sticks in my mind & was Grandma’s favorite- “I come to the garden alone / when the dew is still on the roses. . . .”
In The Garden, Just As I Am, Standing On The Promises, How Great Thou Art and on and on. I am a musician. Mostly retired now, but made a living with music. Many jobs in different churches. I love playing and singing the old hymns best. Love the photos of your flowers.
This was my father‘s favorite hymn.. The song has always been my heart’s anthem, even though I walked away from organized religion because of the southern Baptist convention ! I always wanted to believe in the son of God.💔💔💔
There have been times when I walked away from the church, which is made up of fallible human beings. I still have a relationship with Jesus. Those, mostly men, with their hard, selfish hearts have ceased to define God for me.
I love coreopsis! I spend a lot of time weeding, and I also grow flowers and tomatoes. They bring me joy and give me something to nurture. I often hum old hymns as I work, and I always pray.
By the way, I have WAY more questions than I have answers.
People attend church to pass judgement on the pastor. He can talk about God and, depending on the sect, the angels. But if a pastor gets all full of himself, goes beyond these boundaries and into the moral transgressions of any of the flock, they will vote to oust, and quick. Better than it used to be, staking him and burning him alive. They attend to maintain the boundary lines, insuring that they have continued, uninterrupted peace. The flock likes to keep on singing.
The universe is a fabric of chaotic non-linear threads with a few linear threads. As humans, we focus on the linear, predictable threads and mistakenly believe that is the cloth of the universe given to us by a loving god.
Honestly, as a former Christian, I now find the cult of a cross to be really creepy. It's a cruel instrument of torture, and yet people wear its symbol around their necks and look at the statue of a dead man tortured to death every Sunday. I never understood what it was supposed to inspire in us. Fear? Thankfulness that someone died on a cross because we can then be absolved? I'm supposed to be glad that Jesus died a horrible death? I just don't get it.
Janet, I agree. I think that this was a time in history when human sacrifice was still common, I think that this may have been a way as humans evolved to say enough. We realize human sacrifice is inhumane and doesn’t really appease gods, This was one final sacrifice is for all. I will never understand why something that helped humans evolve 2000 years ago is seen as something to worship now, I will also never get my head around the belief in transmogrification, the belief that when the priest says the magic words the wine and wafer really become blood and body., yuck, I know some past human species practiced cannibalism for food, for burial rights, for religious rights,, but why would we want to continue this even if just in belief form? I don’t understand why books that were written for where our species was over 2000 years ago are books that people use for advice for today’s humans, It has often prevented us from believing in the science that we have discovered that can help us live in much more responsible ways for all LIFE. If I am honest, I often just don’t understand then self destructive nature of much of our species.
Thank you, Janet! That's always been my reaction also. And as someone whose name I'm not sure of once explained the essence of Christianity, "God sacrificed himself (in the person of Christ), to himself, to save us from himself." Think about that one. To which I add Barbara's Corollary, "And if this god really exists, and that makes sense to him, we're all in a lot of trouble."
Thank you. Have ALWAYS felt that way. The religion I grew up in did not worship the cross, did not wear cross jewelry, and did not display crosses on walls, on top of churches and believed that the resurrection was far more important. But I no longer attend church. Cannot abide the whole patriarchy thing and that men will always rule and women have their place and must be obedient and honor the priesthood holder. Thank you for your words.
⚡⚡⚡ Ouch. People worship the worst & strangest things. I read that after DT was allegedly shot (or better yet, grazed) that his sycophants started wearing ear bandages similar to those of the shooteee. Why? Sheep. They also graze. Terrible thought about a beautiful song. Sheep may safely graze and wander.
Reminded me of my grandmother (Nana) as a child she and her parents left the Oklahoma dust bowl for California. They brought their religious beliefs (Church of Christ, slightly to the right of the Baptists) with them. She dragged to church every Sunday morning for my first 17 years.
Beautifully written! As an atheist former Catholic, there were few meaningful songs. I will forever believe that faith mysticism and religion were birthed from music and not the other way around. The old songs of suffering and sadness are comforting. They say that “someone has been there before”, and they lived through it to write about it. That gives us hope. Tragic that the patriarchy captured it. They do not own it.
I left catholism a long time ago. Being raised as an Irish catholic in Boston, it was part of my identity. What did it for me, the absolute last straw, was the Boston Globe Spotlight piece on how the church was not only aware of the abuse, but moved offending priests from parish to parish to parish. The one priest that I was very close to, married my husband and I, baptized all three of my children, established the Boston Priests Forum. The group lobbied for Cardinal Law's removal. Instead, Cardinal Law was PROMOTED to the Vatican. First, I left catholism. Then, I moved to the espicocal church, and then detached from them. Then, when I was diagnosed with a terminal illness, I let go of all religion, and decided to spend my time appreciating my family, friends, and especially my husband, a man who showed me how kindness, with no guarantee of reward, was truly the way forward. You have a beautiful garden, and story.❤️
Deep peace to you.
And also with you. It never leaves, does it??😘
💙
Fitzfield74, I am very sorry that you have been diagnosed with a terminal illness., I applaud your courage to share this and your discovery of what really matters in this life. It validates my own experience, I am glad that you have the love of family and friends and hope you find more moments of love, awe and wonder,
Thank you for your sweet sentiments. It is people like you that keep me going. Peace.
HI Jess, I love your writing. You have a talent for capturing the heart of an issue. Thanks!
Catie
I no longer have a theology either, but this is the one that sticks in my mind & was Grandma’s favorite- “I come to the garden alone / when the dew is still on the roses. . . .”
In The Garden, Just As I Am, Standing On The Promises, How Great Thou Art and on and on. I am a musician. Mostly retired now, but made a living with music. Many jobs in different churches. I love playing and singing the old hymns best. Love the photos of your flowers.
In the Garden. 🎶
This was my father‘s favorite hymn.. The song has always been my heart’s anthem, even though I walked away from organized religion because of the southern Baptist convention ! I always wanted to believe in the son of God.💔💔💔
There have been times when I walked away from the church, which is made up of fallible human beings. I still have a relationship with Jesus. Those, mostly men, with their hard, selfish hearts have ceased to define God for me.
I love coreopsis! I spend a lot of time weeding, and I also grow flowers and tomatoes. They bring me joy and give me something to nurture. I often hum old hymns as I work, and I always pray.
By the way, I have WAY more questions than I have answers.
Why are some plants bad and called weeds? Isn’t that what we do to people.
Weed are just plants that grow where you don’t want them to. 😊✌🏻
People attend church to pass judgement on the pastor. He can talk about God and, depending on the sect, the angels. But if a pastor gets all full of himself, goes beyond these boundaries and into the moral transgressions of any of the flock, they will vote to oust, and quick. Better than it used to be, staking him and burning him alive. They attend to maintain the boundary lines, insuring that they have continued, uninterrupted peace. The flock likes to keep on singing.
Again, what does this have to do with plants? Oh, you’re weed oops reading that as a metaphor. Yes, it can be, but I was being literal.
The universe is a fabric of chaotic non-linear threads with a few linear threads. As humans, we focus on the linear, predictable threads and mistakenly believe that is the cloth of the universe given to us by a loving god.
Off topic. And no astrophysicist will ever tell you the universe is chaotic, besides.
Yes, and so?
You touch so many hearts with your observations and words. Keep on keeping on! 💜
My grandmothers favorite was
In the garden. I am also a Gardner and often weeding and humming the old hymns.
Your posts are read daily as part of my morning coffee time.
Thank you for your insight every day .
That is my favorite hymn too.
Simply beautiful - I identify with your words. Thank you.
I had a similar experience with Christian faith, but the tuneless new hymns have helped keep me away
😢. I understand Liz. I love the music but sometimes it’s just too hard to get past the words. Hugs.
I too grew up going to church and, while I have separated from much of that these days, I still love the old hymns. They speak to my soul.
Honestly, as a former Christian, I now find the cult of a cross to be really creepy. It's a cruel instrument of torture, and yet people wear its symbol around their necks and look at the statue of a dead man tortured to death every Sunday. I never understood what it was supposed to inspire in us. Fear? Thankfulness that someone died on a cross because we can then be absolved? I'm supposed to be glad that Jesus died a horrible death? I just don't get it.
Janet, I agree. I think that this was a time in history when human sacrifice was still common, I think that this may have been a way as humans evolved to say enough. We realize human sacrifice is inhumane and doesn’t really appease gods, This was one final sacrifice is for all. I will never understand why something that helped humans evolve 2000 years ago is seen as something to worship now, I will also never get my head around the belief in transmogrification, the belief that when the priest says the magic words the wine and wafer really become blood and body., yuck, I know some past human species practiced cannibalism for food, for burial rights, for religious rights,, but why would we want to continue this even if just in belief form? I don’t understand why books that were written for where our species was over 2000 years ago are books that people use for advice for today’s humans, It has often prevented us from believing in the science that we have discovered that can help us live in much more responsible ways for all LIFE. If I am honest, I often just don’t understand then self destructive nature of much of our species.
Thank you, Janet! That's always been my reaction also. And as someone whose name I'm not sure of once explained the essence of Christianity, "God sacrificed himself (in the person of Christ), to himself, to save us from himself." Think about that one. To which I add Barbara's Corollary, "And if this god really exists, and that makes sense to him, we're all in a lot of trouble."
Thank you. Have ALWAYS felt that way. The religion I grew up in did not worship the cross, did not wear cross jewelry, and did not display crosses on walls, on top of churches and believed that the resurrection was far more important. But I no longer attend church. Cannot abide the whole patriarchy thing and that men will always rule and women have their place and must be obedient and honor the priesthood holder. Thank you for your words.
Or as I once heard it asked, if Jesus had died in later times, would people be going around wearing little gold electric chairs?
⚡⚡⚡ Ouch. People worship the worst & strangest things. I read that after DT was allegedly shot (or better yet, grazed) that his sycophants started wearing ear bandages similar to those of the shooteee. Why? Sheep. They also graze. Terrible thought about a beautiful song. Sheep may safely graze and wander.
But, as usual, I digress. 😵💫
You really are a terrific writer and I’m sure you are a gifted activist. This is a wonderful post. My garden could use you… thank you!
Reminded me of my grandmother (Nana) as a child she and her parents left the Oklahoma dust bowl for California. They brought their religious beliefs (Church of Christ, slightly to the right of the Baptists) with them. She dragged to church every Sunday morning for my first 17 years.
Really nice, thanks Jess. Keep on keeing on. And work with plants. And Keep Hydrated.
Beautifully written! As an atheist former Catholic, there were few meaningful songs. I will forever believe that faith mysticism and religion were birthed from music and not the other way around. The old songs of suffering and sadness are comforting. They say that “someone has been there before”, and they lived through it to write about it. That gives us hope. Tragic that the patriarchy captured it. They do not own it.