The Exchange Students

American reality as told by high school juniors...

American student: I can’t believe they let you drink as a teenager in Germany.

German exchange student: I can’t believe they give you a gun at birth in America.

This was an exchange I heard between two students in my classroom years ago. It wasn’t extraordinary. It happened every single year. Without fail.

I taught English for 16 years. I started in middle school — eighth grade specifically. It was hard and I assumed it was because teaching is hard and I was new and didn’t have much in the way of classroom management. I later found out it is because there is something insane going on in the brains of middle schoolers. I have raised several myself. I know this to be true. They are fun but wild.

Bless the middle school teachers.

I transferred to a high school building my sixth year of teaching and my life changed. I truly enjoyed teaching American Literature and I loved my class assignment — juniors. They are smart and sarcastic and the perfect age. They are old enough to have engaging and thoughtful conversations without their prefrontal cortex going haywire causing disruptive behavior. They are also not seniors who have one foot out the door and lose their minds in the last semester.

I loved teaching juniors.

One of the perks of teaching 11th grade is that I taught every international exchange student in the school. Technically, all exchange students were considered seniors so they could graduate, but our school wanted them to take American Lit to get the full American experience, so they ended up in my class. I learned so much from these kids. I had several students from Germany and a few from Spain and Italy and France and Greece.

I once had an exchange student from Estonia — she was 16 and already in youth training to be a soldier in her country. I asked why they started training so young and she reminded me of her country’s proximity to Russia. Russian aggression. I will never forget her.

I always asked my exchange students about the differences between the US and their home countries. Almost every student told me how overly-protective American parents are — I think some of the words they used were repressive. Strict. Over the top. I asked them to elaborate.

One girl from Germany explained that as a baby, she napped in a stroller on her apartment balcony. She said her parents went about their lives while she slept outside during all weather elements except rain. An exchange student from the Netherlands explained that parents leave their babies in prams outside of cafes and shops in her country.

American students would always protest at the idea of leaving a baby on the sidewalk.

Someone could kidnap you! Someone could abduct you for ransom. How could your parents be so negligent?

The students from other countries would laugh at the idea of someone abducting a sleeping baby. They were always baffled by what American students would take exception to…teenage drinking and outside stroller sleeping while not even thinking of what America does to its children.

Guns.

Guns are the number one killer of children under 18 in this country. I can’t believe we have hit this low. The lowest low.

Every year, an American student would learn from an exchange student that kids in other countries don’t often worry about gun violence. They don’t have easy access to guns or ammo. They don’t have guns on their fireplace mantles and they don’t have random folks walking around with guns on their hips.

One of the saddest things I’ve ever witnessed was an exchange student going through an American educational pastime — an active shooter drill. This particular student was German and she was horrified by the drill and spoke about it at length for days afterward. She was especially saddened to learn that little children participate in these scary drills.

I asked one of the exchange students if her parents were worried about her traveling to another country…were they worried about her host family or food allergies or her ability to make friends. She said they were most concerned about gun violence.

Me too, friend. Me too.

Food quality and food insecurity.

You will not be surprised to find out exchange students often gain weight while in America. Not a little weight either. Some of them would gain up to 15-20 lbs during their stay in our country. They would have to buy or borrow all new jeans and tops while in America.

*I’m not fat-shaming children. This is an observation.

Some developed acne and others had exaggerated moodiness that was new to them. It could have been the change in scenery, but several of my exchange students complained about the food. Not just that there was too much, the portions were bigger than what they were accustomed to, but that American food was making them feel unwell — sluggish.

I had a student from Spain who said that when she returned home, she lost 15 lbs within weeks. She said she wasn’t necessarily eating less. She came to the conclusion that something is just wrong with the food in America.

My American students were stunned to learn that additives and chemicals we use in our foods are banned in other countries. That students in other countries eat the same brands of foods, but the ingredients are often different.

My Estonian student once remarked on paying for lunch in school. She had never seen a school lunch cafeteria with a cash register. She asked if it was just for adults and seemed puzzled when I said all students pay for lunch unless they qualify for a free lunch — if their parents were economically disadvantaged. She was pretty pissed about it actually.

Me too, friend. Me too.

Lack of academic rigor.

This one always caught my American students by surprise. Many exchange students who spent a year in America did it to the detriment of their education. They learned new and different things, but I had an Italian student who told me she would have to repeat the entire year in Italy.

She said that the education standards in many American schools didn’t require the rigor that her Italian school required. A sad statement. And not one that is exactly true.

Her statement was surprising to my American students, but I knew part of the reason isn’t because we dumb down our standards, but because socio-economic issues in America don’t always exist in other countries…or at least not to the extent that they do in America. It is more difficult to teach to the middle when so many kids start so far behind — in poverty. Disadvantaged.

We also have defunded public schools and have created mandates for educators by folks with no background in education. America has handed our schools over to people with no business in education.

There is not much “competition” between schools in other countries. Schools tend to be funded more equitably.

Students in the best-performing countries have access to wrap-around services like health care and counseling, and of course, free lunches. Kids in other countries aren’t always measured and tortured by standardized tests. Schools in other wealthy nations are generally directed by educators, not bureaucrats.

My exchange students also remarked on how underappreciated American educators are — how teachers are revered for their service in their home countries. That teachers in many countries have a special status. These exchange students often treated me with a respect I had never encountered. They said they learn well from teachers they respect, that this respect was expected by parents and administrators, and they couldn’t believe the way American teachers were treated.

Me too, friend. Me too.

As much as I like to dunk on America right now, everything wasn’t bad or awful for these exchange students. In fact, I think most things the kids experienced were positive. My students attended pep rallies and band concerts and football games and rodeos and high school plays and musicals. They loved American cheerleading. They dressed up and went to prom and homecoming.

They experienced a slice of America. America with all of its warts and inconsistencies. America with its history — good and bad.

I don’t think even one of my exchange students regretted their experience.

I sure didn’t regret teaching them.

~Jess