I am an organizer. I know how to resist and teach others to resist, but I am overwhelmed right now and I can’t pretend that I don’t see what is going on in this country or close my eyes to the connections we are all making.
I also taught literature for too long to look away. I know what I know. See what I see.
I haven’t written in days because I couldn’t bear to say what needs to be said. I am scared. I know many of you are too, but it is time to do something. I am up, still in my slippers, typing in my office overlooking the back of our property.
I can’t quit thinking about how life keeps going even under the threat of fascism.
My donkey, Gus, is in a shed at the back of the property because we have had a massive cold snap. Two nights ago, it got down to -25 degrees. Too cold for even Gus with his wooly winter coat.
My little donkey pokes his head out to bray when he hears UPS making a delivery or if he catches me out back with the dogs. I’ll put Gus back into the pasture when the cold breaks. That’ll make him happy.
President Donald Trump on his first full day in office Tuesday defended his decision to grant clemency to people convicted of assaulting police officers during the 2021 attack on the Capitol and suggested there could be a place in American politics for the Proud Boys and Oath Keepers, extremist groups whose leaders were convicted of seditious conspiracy against the U.S.
The Proud Boys are Trump’s version of the Brownshirts — A relic of Hitler’s paramilitary group, much like the Blackshirts of fascist Italy.
In the past few days, I have been looking through seed catalogs and making orders. I will always grow a vegetable garden — heavy on tomatoes and squash and beans — but I have wanted to have a cut-flower garden too. I think this is the year that I will do that.
My husband built two raised beds for me a few years back, but I think I will need more. I recently watched an episode of my favorite British gardening show, Gardeners’ World, and one of the hosts created a cut-flower garden in several beds. Massive beds of Dahlias and Cosmos and Zinnias and Coreopsis and Peonies. Gorgeous.
The host was able to keep vases in her own home full of wildflowers and enough left over to sell at a farmer’s market. That sounds like fun. Maybe I’ll try it.
After effusively thanking the crowd at the Capital One Arena for electing Trump, Elon Musk placed his right hand on his chest and stretched his arm outward, his palm facing the ground. He then turned around and repeated the gesture before placing his hand on his chest again.
Elon Musk gave a Nazi salute — Sieg Heil after Trump’s inauguration. I will not let anyone gaslight me. I saw what I saw.
My grandkids have been out of school for a few days for the extreme cold and for sicknesses. I drove down to stay with them while my son and daughter-in-law went to work. As soon as I walk in the house, the kids start patting me down for toys or gifts or candy or some other treat.
I was down at their house just yesterday and brought each of the grandkids a St Patrick’s Day t-shirt to wear to school. I don’t want them to get pinched so each tee is bright green. I bet that pinching each other is thing of the past though — it truly was a little like assault as I remember.
Each one of my little grandbabies received a “lucky” t-shirt. I didn’t buy the “Kiss me I’m Irish” tee for my oldest granddaughter because her classmates can read and I didn’t want a little boy to take her up on it.
Missouri Gov. Mike Kehoe issued orders to track undocumented migrants. Kehoe’s executive orders will position Missouri Troopers ‘to assist with immigration enforcement when called upon by President Trump’s administration.’
Historian Timothy Snyder referred to as “Obeying in Advance.” Missouri’s Governor has shown the Trump administration what it can get away with. My state gave way to immigrant roundups without the mandate forcing it to do so.
I am a pretty good cook, and years ago, with five kids gathered around the table, we rarely went out to eat. Now that I only have one left in the house, I’m pretty lazy about cooking. We eat out a lot.
I found a roast at the bottom of the chest freezer this morning, though, and I put it in the crockpot. I don’t love using my crockpot, but I know I am not up to standing at the stove for an hour or so tonight. I put some potatoes and carrots and onions and celery in with the meat. I’ve been trying to lay off the carbs since January, but not only do I plan to eat the potatoes, I think I’ll throw some French bread in the oven to sop up the gravy. Perfect for a winter evening.
Following Donald Trump’s swearing-in on Monday, the federal website reproductiverights.gov mysteriously went offline. Launched by the Biden administration in 2022, the website offered crucial information on reproductive rights, including access to abortion, cancer screenings, prenatal care, and HIV testing.
Banning and censoring important information are fascist hallmarks: they control forms of communication through censorship and propaganda. Fascists often censor newspapers, magazines, books, websites, music, and television.
We are living in precedented times…we have seen countries elect demagogues throughout history. We have seen the suffering doled out to the poor and marginalized. We have seen the death camps that regular people constructed and carried out murder inside. We have seen all of this before — it’s just not been packaged so efficiently in the US.
Except for indigenous genocide. And slavery. And Reconstruction. And Jim Crow. And Civil Rights. And women’s rights. And gay and trans rights. And…
It’s precedented. It just looks different.
You know what you are seeing, just like I do, and the strangest thing that I never gave enough thought to was that life goes on while a country falls apart.
While the President creates his own extra-judicial police force.
While a close aide to the President gives a Nazi salute.
While red-state Governors are eager to profile and deport immigrants and citizens who don’t look American enough.
While government websites go down or turn into agents of pure propaganda.
From the Kendall Camera Club. Titled, “Juxtaposition”
In the meantime, I will focus on what I can do to help in Missouri. I know my power is limited at the federal level, but I can help stop awful federal mandates by gathering groups and opposing my state lawmakers implementing those awful mandates.
This is our power. It’s local. Focus there. Pay attention everywhere, but fight at the local level.
We still have power.
Take care of the livestock and post in your social groups about the rise of a paramilitary group beholden to Trump. Order your garden seeds and keep a record of Nazi and fascist players in the government. Play with the grandkids and write a letter to the editor. Make supper and make a phone call to your Representative.
Don’t look away and don’t give any official even one inch.
Hold their feet to the fire while you handle your responsibilities. These times aren’t for the weak…we are in it together.
In solidarity.
~Jess
P.S. I want to invite you to a Blue Missouri meeting on Thursday, Jan 23 at 6pm CST. I will have special guests Ashley Aune and Fred Wellman. Aune is the Missouri Democratic Minority Leader, and Wellman is the host of “On Democracy” and National Chairman of Forgotten Democrats. We will talk on organizing at the local level.
I’d love to see you. Here is the link: https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/mJFa3U7SQ7eXkskrjuzwGg#/registration
Thank you, Jess, for all that you continue to do. Sending support from CA, which people think is immune from fascism, but it’s not.
Jess, I feel for you. I hope we can all remember this: Just because old institutions fail (and fall) doesn't mean that new institutions can't (and won't) rise to replace them. We may be witnessing the dissolution of the country we knew. But that doesn't mean we can't organize to build a better future. The light may dim in the places we're used to looking...but we can build a new collection of fires, around which we gather, and link them together...